Ma baby done flied away...

Noah flew --solo-- down to Atlanta to stay with his friends for a week or two (That's them, up above: the tall boy in the middle and his younger bro a few kids to the right in the dark jacket. Their little sis isn't in the pic). He had a four-day summer camp experience a few years ago, but this is the longest we'll have been apart. Ever. (sniff)

Actually, it's not quite sadness I'm feeling. It is sad that he's not with us, and that he's growing up and leaving his childhood behind with me, and that it's just not as funny around here without him.

But heading off on his own is such an exciting thing for him to do, and I feel that sense of adventure along with him. I remember how it feels to be responsible for yourself for the first time and how very thrilling that is.

And I have to say that I'm very proud of him. He's a cautious kid; he's not exactly afraid to try new things, but he sees potential pitfalls and treads carefully. He'd rather not do something at all than try it and have it go wrong.

Doing this --flying alone, to a huge, strange place-- is something he wouldn't have attempted for anyone but his best friend. OK, so the annoying little bro was a bit of a motivator, too... Still, he overcame his fears and nerves and made himself just do it. I can't believe he's the same kid that I had to drag, literally kicking and screaming, into the tubes at Chuck E. Cheese. (Note to Noah's friends who are reading this: he was only two years old at the time.)

(sniff) My baby's growing up. I'm left with the same feeling I have on each of my birthdays: that life is fleeting, passing me too quickly by; that I don't ever want this to end! This --this life I've made, that I'm living-- is not at all what I'd like it to be, but it's so much more in so many ways. I may be many things, have many interests, beyond motherhood. I may be a fascinating woman (I'm not, but I could be!) with many facets besides being a mother. But what do they matter, compared with this?

They just don't. Not to me, anyway.