So, after re-reading my last post, I'm thinking...
I guess one of my biggest problems is that I lack social skills. I'm just not very graceful in conversations with others. I hate making small talk (it's hard work for me) and I really hate talking on the phone (I guess I rely on body language a lot). Simply talking to other people is just not something I'm good at.
OK. That's no surprise to me, I suppose, but here's my question: Can someone who is socially inept teach their children how to be socially suave? I know if I need to teach Algebra, I can just get a book about it or find a few websites and learn it myself, then pass it on. But social skills? Other than things like writing thank you notes and saying "please" and "thank you," I'm not sure how to teach my kids.
I know a lot of my friends who are naturally good at entertaining or are social butterflies. How do you teach that if not by example? Is it even possible?
God, I hope so.
Anyone who wants to teach me, just step right up.
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1 comment:
Hmmm ... tough question. You will not be surprised to hear that I struggle with the same thing (here in Aspergerville). I want one of those Freak Flags. Have you got one for sale? Does it have the three headed squirrel logo on it? I hope so. ;-)
First of all, it is my expert opinion that you *are* a strong role model for social skills. You are smart, friendly, funny and "real."
Second, I guess this delves into the question of *how* kids learn social skills. Most learn through example, from parents and other loved ones I suppose. But not all do. Some learn it intellectually.
And I think there *are* specific skills we can help kids learn. The give and take of conversation, finding topics of mutual interest, noticing and showing an interest in people's special qualities. Non-verbal communication: body language and so forth. Social cognition: "getting" where people are coming from. I believe all these things can be explicitly taught over time. Unfortunately I suck at it.
I look forward to seeing what others have to say.
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